Sunday, January 1, 2012

Looking Back and Looking Forward

Happy New Year!

The past year was a year of change, of healing, and of blessings. The best change, healing agent, and blessing is (of course) Michaela. When I lost Michael, I seriously thought that my dream of having a child might be lost, too. My pregnancy with her was so challenging, but she is the best baby. She was worth it all. It is not easy doing this on my own, but it is so rewarding.

Other changes were work-related. While I wouldn't call my new situation perfect, it is an improvement from where I found myself a year ago. I am working with some other teachers who have experienced great losses as well, and there is an understanding amongst us that I truly appreciate and need.

For the most part, I have been living in the moment - not looking back too, too much, and not looking forward so much, either. Looking back can be painful, and looking forward overwhelming. However, I am beginning to think about my future more and acknowledging the desires of my heart to the Lord. I would like to be married again someday, and I would like Michaela to have a man in her life who would love her as his own. I know that Michael would just want me to be happy, and to have the Lord's best for Michaela and me. I have known of several "widow friends" who married again this past year, and their new happiness is a beautiful thing to see. So, I enter the new year with an open heart to the possibility of a new relationship, and the intention of waiting on the Lord to see where He leads me in that.

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD,
“plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.
Jeremiah 29:11


  1. Praying 2012 brings you and Michaela many blessings.

    Love you, friend!

  2. Happy New Year! I'm sure that there will be wonderful things in store for you and Michaela and I'm looking forward to watching them unfold here on your blog.

  3. Wishing you and Michaela a Very Happy New Year, Joannah!!!
    Jan, John & Jillian

  4. Happy New Year! What a blessing to be welcoming in the new year with your sweet Michaela in your arms!

  5. Visiting from Kelly's Korner! Your daughter is beautiful! Praying you find a connection!

  6. Visiting from Kellys Korner. Happy New Year to you and your daughter.

  7. Joannah, You are a beautiful young woman and Michaela is just precious! You must be a strong, courageous person and I pray Psalm 20:4 for you.
    "May He grant you according to your heart's desire and make all your plans succeed."

    Coming from Kelly's Korner too! Praying for that special person for you and your sweet daughter!

  8. Visiting from Kelly's Korner and just want to tell you that you are richly blessed with that beautiful little sweetie! I know God hears your prayers and will bring you just the right man that will cherish and love both of you!

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  10. Hello! I linked here from Kelly's Korner SUYL - "Singles over 40" and am confused because I don't see any post of yours that relates to the reason for her post...?

  11. Visiting from Kelly's Korner and saying, "Hi" from Cookeville, TN. God bless.

  12. visiting from stratford ontario canada and praying that a wonderful partner will be in the future for you patti

  13. Also visiting from Kelly's Korner! I'm newly "widowed" (and I DON'T like that word!). Thanks for the link and your encouragement! You can follow my (new) journey at (my best friend/husband/kid's daddy died in an accident on 11/5/11).

  14. Just found your blog and it's very inspiring!! My husband and I have been trying to get pregnant for a year and half now with one failed IVF.
    I'm your newest follower!!


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