Fetus at twenty-eight weeksI was hoping to get an image like this one of Michaela at Monday's ultrasound appointment, but she was not in a good position to do so according to the technician. The technician was a little heavy-handed with the ultrasound device, so I didn't want to be there any longer than necessary anyway. The technician said that Michaela is measuring about a week ahead of schedule. On Monday, I was 27 weeks and 2 days, but the baby measured in a 28 weeks and 1 day. She weighs nearly two and a half pounds.
I did the two-hour glucose test on Tuesday morning. No fun, but it could have been worse I suppose. Then I got a call from one of my OBs on Wednesday evening that the test showed that while I don't have gestational diabetes, my sugars are kind of high. He wants me to see a nutritional counselor for that. It's always something. He also said that I'm slightly anemic. So, I will have to start taking iron supplements. I picked one up today that isn't supposed to cause constipation. Wish me luck!
My back is still hurting, but since I've been resting it has improved. I have noticed that the more I do, the more it hurts. I've also had a cold for the last week. Between the two, I've just had to take it real easy. I found a great service that will deliver meals twice a week (for a small fortune, of course). This has been a really good thing for me. I'm just not up to cooking right now.
Still dealing with reflux most evenings. Blech! My teeth and gums have really suffered during this pregnancy. I'm seeing the dentist on Monday, and I am afraid that they won't like what they see. Oh, well. The first half of my pregnancy it was nearly impossible for me to brush my teeth in the evenings without triggering a "hug the toilet moment", so I usually skipped that. And, I skipped my last cleaning a couple months ago because of my migraines. Now I find that my gums are just kind of sore in spots even though my hygiene has improved.
I will see my OB again on Monday, and we'll decide then if I'm ready to go back to work next week. I have to admit that with not feeling well physically and anticipating the first anniversary of Michael's passing in just a couple of weeks, work is the last place I want to be. I am so weary physically and emotionally at this point. I just want to hibernate. I am longing for spring, better health, and a happy ending to this pregnancy.
Dear Joannah! Where you are right now in your grief journey, going back to work will be very challenging. Not to mention your pregnancy and the physical toll that is having. I am wondering if your OB will allow you to remain off for medical reasons - both physical and emotional? Approaching the first anniversary took so much out of me and I wasn't having the added pregnancy complications at the same time. I vividly recall the few weeks/month leading up to the first anniversary were so, so difficult. In many ways, harder than the day itself. I don't want to always sound like I am talking about myself, just wanting to say I can relate unlike many others. I urge you to be extra gentle with yourself and to surround yourself with those who will support you and uphold you during this time. In some ways it is harder than right after a loved one passes. At the time of death many people are around, offer their help, pray, bring meals, encourage, etc... Now, a year later, they aren't all there. Lives get busy for others and they don't stop and think or they don't know what TO do, so they do or say nothing. It can be very isolating and frustrating. We just want them to talk about our loved one, to remember along with us, to hug us, to let us know that he is not forgotten. (and that likewise, we in our grief are not forgotten). I will send extra prayers your way and hold you up and support you. Please know that I understand, I am here for you. You can let me know via email or FB if you ever want to talk, or email privately. Hugs to you, my friend.
ReplyDeleteJoannah, I cannot believe that the anniversary is coming up so soon. I agree with Sarah above. After Laura passed, we had so many people reach out, but life goes on and soon after we were on our own to deal with our grief. I KNOW that Michael is watching over you and your baby girl. Spring is right around the corner!
ReplyDeleteHang in there girly! All of those not so nice moments will be worth it. And, there will be plenty of time to work later. The most important thing right now is resting. It will soon be a thing of the past ;) I mean that in the best way! I can't wait to meet my little man's little lady in a few more weeks!
ReplyDeleteXOXO
What they said! I cannot believe that you can even think of returning to work. Please be sure the OB knows exactly what is going on with you both emotionally and physically.
ReplyDeleteSending hugs your way.
Dear Joaannah,
ReplyDeleteWe couldn't agree more with everyone's loving comments!!
Sending lots of Love, ((Hugs)) and Prayers your way!!
Jan, John & Jillian Rose
I've been reading your blog for a several months now. I am amazed by you, your strength, and perserverance, and the truth and beauty you write in your words, despite the pain. I can't wait for you to meet your sweet baby and have joy once again. Thanks for sharing. Hugs-
ReplyDeleteOh wow! I have just found you again and I am amazed and filled with happiness at the sweet gift of your child. Michael is with you...every step.
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