Monday, May 10, 2010

Mother's Day Past & Present

I am used to Mother's Day being difficult. I have spent the last five years trying to become a mother through adoption and fertility treatments, and I have not succeeded. Each Mother's Day is kind of a signpost pointing to the failure of those efforts.

On the other hand, I am blessed to still have my mother and the occasion to honor her on Mother's Day. I know for many people the day is a painful reminder of the mother they have lost.

Last Mother's Day weekend (2009) was a lot of fun. I thought about it all last week. Michael was performing out in Las Vegas that weekend, and we invited anyone who was interested in going to join us. Michael's parents and his aunt and uncle went, so did my parents, my Aunt Maureen, and my grandmother. And, because my cousin Amy who lives in Las Vegas was celebrating her 50th, my great aunt (her mom) and my cousin Ken (her brother) were out there, too. Not to mention, two of Michael's younger brothers live in Henderson. So, it was a big group of us. Michael arranged for our families to see the show. It was the only time my parents had the chance to see him perform. I'm so glad they were able to do that.

On Mother's Day, Michael gave me a card - my first Mother's Day card. That was very thoughtful considering. He appreciated everything I'd done to become a mother and he knew it broke my heart that our IVF hadn't worked. But we were both still hopeful that the summer would bring good news. His card read:

To My Wife
How beautiful is Love
and how beautiful is Life
For one very simple reason
Because you are my wife.
Happy Mother's Day

He wrote, "and hopefully soon to be mother... I love you. Michael"

I love that guy...

We met up with our families for brunch at The Original Pancake House. It was so good to be all together like that. Little did we know that it would be the last Mother's Day we'd celebrate with Michael and my grandmother.

Yesterday wasn't easy, but it was nice. My mother-in-law had invited me and my parents to join them for dinner. It wasn't the whole family, just a small group of us. My sweet sister-in-law Cathie prepared a delicious dinner, my mom brought an incredible dessert, and we just enjoyed our time together. We were all aware of what has been lost since this time last year, but there was comfort in spending the time together.


  1. Michael is such a treasure. You were a wonderful wife and you'll be a great mom someday too.



  2. I am sure yesterday must have been hard for you.
    ((((big hugs))))

  3. How can you not love that guy? He has a way with words and I have been meaning to tell you that I watched the documentary that was made in his honor. I really felt like I had known him for a long time. It was such a beautiful tribute to an amazing man.

  4. I was thinking about you yesterday, Joannah. I knew it would be difficult for many reasons, but I'm glad you were with your family and Michael's. I pray that in the future you will be blessed with children.

  5. I think of you a lot since I have found your blog..I watched the video tribute and all I can say is your husband was amazing..So handsome and so talented. His smile showed his his eyes and I love that:) Hugs to you and you are in my prayers.

  6. Well another "First" mixed with old wounds after dealing with IF ... that was probably not very easy for you. It sounds like the day ended up being nice though, considering it all.

    I forgot to mention as well, I watched Michaels tribute and I agree with the other commenters....what a handsome man, whose smile showed in his eyes, very endearing indeed.

    I loved the card he wrote for you. What an amazing husband....



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